NOTHING is Guaranteed

When we are young, we think that we will live forever. We think that everything around us is going to stay the same; that nothing will change. As we get older, we come to realize that such notions are not feasible. Through our experiences, we learn that change is inevitable. The sooner we accept that concept, the easier it is to accept change. This general principle is known as Impermanence in Buddhism. More specifically, Impermanence stresses that nothing is permanent; everything in the world is subject to change (Hanh, 131).  For example, flowers decompose, loved ones pass away, we are not always in good health. These are changes that cannot be avoided. While such a notion sounds depressing, it really isn’t. Having this knowledge that everything can change at any instant makes us appreciate what we have, “when we know that the person we love is impermanent, we will cherish our beloved all the more” (Hanh, 132). Impermanence is also crucial to our life today. Impermanence allows us to grow. Without impermanence, we would never change; it “makes transformations possible” (Hanh, 133). As a whole, impermanence “helps us appreciate fully what is there, without attachment or forgetfulness” (Hanh, 133). When we embrace impermanence, we become more at peace with the world around us and value everything in our lives all the more.

Congregational Church Fire

When thinking of the general concept of impermanence in my own life, many examples come to mind. I can remember when I was younger, at a sporting event, I would always hear the bell tower from the Congregational Church in the center of town ring every hour. I can remember appreciating the tune and always thinking about how it made my town more welcoming. Driving into town, we would always see the steeple at the top of the hill, and to me, that was a very characteristic aspect to my town. The church had been there as long as anyone could remember. In a sense, it held a lot of my town’s identity. A couple of years ago, the church caught on fire and burned down. It was an arsony case. Many people stood on the streets at 2 in the morning gaping in horror at the sight. This wasn’t just a parish loss, but a community loss. I did not realize how much I loved that church until it was gone. Now, the church is almost entirely rebuilt to its former glory. I personally, cannot wait until I hear it chime the hour again. In this case, the impermanence made me appreciate and treasure the Somers Congregational Church.

Nick and Me, Fall 2011

As I had said before, when we are young, we tend to think that we will live forever. Death is not something that we, as teenagers, think about often. The first time I faced a death of someone I knew well was last year. It wasn’t an older relative, in fact, this death was very sudden and unexpected. His name was Nick Coleman. Through my senior year, the two of us grew to be very good friends, talking all of the time. Nick and I were very close. Going into the summer, we lost touch and the last time I saw him was my grad party. I always thought that later on, we would be able to catch up over coffee; talk about life and everything that has happened since. Unfortunately, I never got that opportunity. On October 11, 2012, Nick blacked out at the car wheel (due to low blood sugar) and crashed his car into a tree just over the town border into East Longmeadow. He died the next day. This was a change I never expected. In a small town like mine, unexplained deaths like that don’t happen. After getting over the shock, I felt grief, then regret. I regretted allowing us to grow apart. I regretted not telling him how much I cared about him and how I appreciated his friendship. Nick’s death taught me what impermanence is trying to stress: change is inevitable. When we accept that change can happen, we will value the times we have and have fewer regrets when that change does happen. If I had an “impermanent mindset” when Nick and I were friends, I would not have the regrets I do. However, Nick’s death taught me to appreciate my friends and to tell them that. My friends all know how much I appreciate them, and Nick is a big reason why. Nothing is permanent or guaranteed. I know that now and I am happier with my life now because of it.

Citation:

               Nhá̂t, Hạnh. The Heart of the Buddha's Teaching: Transforming Suffering into Peace, Joy & Liberation.     New York: Broadway, 1999. Print.